Of memories, engagements and good-for-nothing brothers...

It's amusing to watch long lost relatives gush over you with 'Oh, you are so grown up now!' not realizing that one does grow up in a decade's time. There is this aunt of mine whom I have met only thrice in life - once on my naming ceremony (mom tells me that she named me!!), then once at her daughter's wedding where I was dragged to, much against my wishes as my mother didn't want to cook for just one person and then finally at my brother's engagement last week.

This aunt almost had tears in her eyes to watch me prance around in a sari that day when the only two other memories of her about me must have been 

1. me in a pram waiting to be named with some rather good name (Don't ask..I should probably sue her for naming me this name)

2. me in some pink frilly frock (the fairy frock, it used to be called) looking hungrily at the buffet.

But then you realise that memories are not always for the experiences one witnessed. They are stories we heard or talk about which some how got stuck to our minds. I am quite unsure about how to react to these situations. Do you greet back with the same enthusiasm which you know is going to be quite a feat for you to achieve because honestly you never remembered that person in the last 10 years? or do you simply acknowledge their emotions smilingly, knowing that you are not quite the same person they remember you to be..but it's ok to let things be? Somehow the latter seems alright.

Talking of memories, it is sad to see some older relatives struggling with names and identities especially when hit with too much information. I remember meeting one of my grandma's brothers at a function 2 years back. My dad is one of his favourite nephews and the love got passed on to me by default. Memories of my childhood when we used to visit his place and stories of my grandma as a naughty kid, came flooding in.  But the confused look on his face was heart-wrenching. I could see him struggle with his mind trying to match names with faces. Even sadder was to see his eyes brimming with guilt when he said, 'I am sorry but I couldn't recognize you.' How do you deal with that? 'Anna, mi shamachi mulgi' (Grandpa, I am Sham's daughter). Thankfully, 'shama's' name rung a bell. 'Oh, you are that car winner!!' (Refer this) Yes! That's how my grandfather finally remembered me. It's funny and sad at the same time. Such is life!!

Talking of engagements, my silly self realized that wearing a sari at family functions can be quite hazardous to health. Even more hazardous when you are the only sister to a gang of guys with none having mastered the art of subtlety. There was sneering, sniggering, laughing behind backs and laughing out loud involved. There was also some fuming, cursing under the breathe, cursing out loud and warning that one would walk out and rather attend the birthday party on 2nd floor of the reception hall involved. But of course, brothers being brothers, one eventually learns to ignore them after 24 years of existence and so  my pretty self stayed on. Other more mature and older set of relatives were pleasantly surprised. And that's when things began to run downhill. Collective opinions about my marriageable age were met with collective nods just when I was grabbing a hot puri. By the time I was pouring chocolate sauce over vanilla ice-cream, my wedding menu was almost being finalised!! But then my mom-dad being completely aware of their first-born's mental age much calamities were averted.

So its decided!! I am wearing a pair of baggy jeans and some old T-shirt for bhai's shaadi. Even if it makes me look like one of those crooks who gatecrash weddings for fun and free food. How 3 idiot-ish, no? ;)

Amchya gharcha Ganpati

My dissertation research proposal looks back at me. I haven't typed a single word for the last 30 mins. I simply stare blankly...the mind clearly lost in a myriad of thoughts. Of some place else...

Kai challa asel aata tithe? Babdu office madhun aala asel...Baba, Kaka hi aale astil. Jevana zali astil..rather urakanyat aali astil. Murti kitpat tayar zali he baghnyat Shashi kaka dang astil. Dar varshi pramane ajun chehra, dole, shela ani dhotaracha painting urlela ashnaar. Mag Shashi Kaka damdaati karun tya JJ chya artist la pakdun basavnaar...pandhra dhotar ani tyavar silver-green ashi patent border. Shela matra gulabi ani soneri border. Shindenchya murtichya hya goshtinvar compromise karna shakyach nahi!! Dole kadhnyat matra tya artist cha talent panala lagta..aaju-bajuchyanni bolaycha hi naahi..fakt thakk houn baghat basaycha ani zala ki tya mhatarya artistcha chehryavarcha anand baghaycha! Hey sagla Shashi Kakanchya able guidance khali..afterall in-house artist tech. Tashi majhi aai hi artist..magchya varshi Ganpati che dole ani moracha pisara tinech paint kela hota!! (Pose hoti : Moravarcha Ganpati)

Shashi Kaka murtiche incharge tarr..Baba ani Sharad Kaka decoration incharge. Varchya maalyavarcha (attic) toh lokhandi trunk khaali aanlyashivay decoration chi survatach hou shakat nahi. Tya pitaaryat kai kai nahi asa vicharu naka...Ganpati che vastra, bhandi, lightings, ekda chukun aanlele ani kadhich na vaparlele disco bulbs, devache daagine, plastic chi phula-veli, kadhikali vaparlele thermocol che blocks, 5 varshanpurvi decoration la vaparlela velvet ani moon paper ani lahan mulanchya crafts chya kit madhye saptil tya rangi-berangi tiklya, mani, khade, laces ani metallic borders!! Darr varshi tyat navin navin goshti sapadtat..almost like a Pandora's box!

So Sharad Kakanni toh jad (almost 20 kilo) pitaara malyavarun khali kadayla Babdu la sangitla asnaar jo tyane soyiskar ritya Kaustubh var dhakalla asel. Kaustubh hi shevti Babdu Shethchach bhau...tyane te Sai var paas on kela asnaar!! Shevti Kakancha patience sampnaar...ani High Command chidlele baghun doghahi Kaustubh-Babdu maalyavar chadun toh trunk mukatyane khaali kadhtil!

Mag decoration kai karaycha hya var ek kautumbik discussion-cum-debate hoil. Baba mhantil - "Hya varshi kahi tari saadhach karuya" Tyavar Kaki ani Aai hi duzora detil "Ho, ho..aata vay zala aapla..nahi jhepat aata..barrich varsha kela khoop..." Babdu-Kaustubh faar kahi bolnar nahit..tyanna mahitiye..hey dar-varshi che dialogues ahet...kiti hi saadha mhantla tari tya doghanna akkhi ratra sagle jagavnaar ani nahi nahi mhanta..decoration "saadhach aapla kahitari" chya definition chya well beyond janaar.

Ratri 11 vajta finally decoration chi theme tharel.. Hya varshi chya Ganpati chi pose : Shri Krishna chya avtaratla Ganpati! "Ubhi murti..mhanje side la jaast decoration hava..maage kami..kimaan 5 ft che pillars tari have bajula..Garden scene karuya...Pillars varun hirvya veli soduya..samor ek fence karuya...sawdust la green colour deuya ani suklyavar gavat mhanun vapruya....ki khara gavat ugvaycha?? ani ceiling varun ek laaman diva soduya. Bhinti var curtains chya magun dhaga paint karuya...nahitar sandhyakal cha effect dakhvayla dark navy blue cha background ani tyavar chandane...ani 3 varshan purvi vaparlela card board cha chandra aselach na? Kai?? Tutla? Thike...punha banvu..ani tyanchyavar white paint maarun silver colour chi chamki takuya!!" Sarvanumate finally decoration chi theme tharel!

Thermocol
Cardboard
Plywood
Velvet papers
Paint
Silver glitter
Golden glitter
Sawdust
Curtains
Khoti phula
Khotya veli
Khari phula
Laaman diva

Ashi checklist tayar hoil...kaam delegate karnyat yeil. Aai aavdine pillars la grey colour marayla basel. Sai ugaach madhye madhye karayla yeil. "Mala yeta na painting, mala karu de! Mi elementary chi exam pan pass zale na" vagaire ugaach justifications deil..bakiche sagle tila major ignore martil :P Tichyavar avishwas mhanun nahi..mhanje toh aahe! pan mostly konalahi aapla kaam sodaycha nahiye...Kaahich kaam naslelyanna saglyat tukkar kaama miltat he anubhavane mahitiye - "Jaa thanda panyachi bottle gheun ye", "He khali padlele khile uchal" , kinva "Fevicol madhye pani taakun dilute kar" vagaire vagaire...

12-1 vajta Utpal Kaki ani Mothi Aai (Aaji)chi wicket padel...sakali laukar uthun naivedya karaychay mhanun tya zopayla jaanar...Magchya varshi saarkhi agdich crisis situation asel tar matra Utpal Kaki madatila thambel..nahitar ticha baakichyanvar major confidence asto! Neeta Kaki entertainment quotient sathi thambel ani 'olya chandanyanvar chamki taak' - ashi Sai-level chi kama karel :P

Ratri 3 vajta Aai chi wicket padel ani ti zopayla jaeel..Kaka ani Babancha to paryant teesra chaha zalela asnaar. Suddenly realise hoil ki thermocol kinva paper samplay...pahate 3 vajta mag Kaustubh Sheth gadi kaadhtil ani drive cum shopping saathi baher padtil. (Ganpatichya aadlya ratri Dadar-Lalbaug chi decorations-viknaari dukana suru astat). Ratrabhar kaam chalel ani pahate kadhitari Shashi kakancha murti tayaar aslyacha nirop yeil.

Murti aanayla jaane ha ek major thrilling experience asto. Pahate-pahate tar ultimate majja yete! Murti gharat yei paryant baki tayari zaleli aste - mhanje kasa-basa to paryant sagla neet aavarlela asta. Murti baghun sagle as usual ultimate khush hotat ani Mothi aai che dole panavtat.

Sakal hoil ani decoration la finishing touches lagayla lagtil..."Almost done" he vakya kiman 15-20 vela mhanun zalya nantar Ganpati stthanapanna hoil ani puja suru hoil...aarti hoil, naivedya vadhnyat yeil. Ani mag amche Babdu sheth, Kaustubh sheth dharadhurr zopayla jaatil. Baba tarihi davakhanyat jaatil ani donhi kaka aaplya factory madhye.

He sagla chitra dolyasamuran jatay..geli 22 varsha tya chitraat mi hi hote...madhye madhye ludbudat..ratrabhar jaagat..majhya so-called exemplary creative ani imaginative skills display karat...ani Ganpatit 11 divas ka hoina 'Joint Family' cha anand ghet. Aaplyavar aalela kaam dusryavar dhakalne..airvi 4 pan aata eka velis 12 jevanachya patravalya vadhat, ani 12 mansaat ek toilet-bathroom share karat (!!!) he divas ayushyacha ek immemorable part zale..

Aaj ratri kharach Cost Management kinva Dissertation proposal honaar nahiye majhya kadun! Mi ithe ka aahe...hech kalat nahiye mala :( Deva saathi nahi tar ghara saathi tari aaj mala ghari asayla hava hota asa saarkha vattay..Aai ugaach 2 vela call karun senti suddha karun geli. Hmph!

Pan 'It sux' chya palikade kharach kahi uttar nahiye..
Udya sakali laukar uthun, zara traditionally dress up honyache nakhare karnare..
Campus mandiratlya pujela hi jaeen...pan gharchi majja nahi.
Aso.
So finally, jithe asal tithe..."Ganpati Bappa Morya" ani "Pudhchya varshi Ganpati barobar tumhi hi ghari (me suddha) ya!!" :)

Sunday Lunch

This was probably my last Sunday at home before I start for MICA and PGP2. Probably the last academic year of my life, awaits me there. I wanted to make this day special for the family, and hence what was only a common discussion topic finally happened...I prepared a full-fledged Sunday meal for everyone, and boy! Did it turn out well? :)

Sundays at our place, are for indulgence and heavy lunches are a given. The menu was decided a day in advance and after the lot of contemplation over my limited cooking skills and family’s limited endurance, the dishes chosen were:
- Tandoori Chicken
- Grilled vegetables
- Salad
- Chicken curry
- Rotis
- Jeera Rice
- Ice-cream

After going through the latest updates on Shiney Ahuja’s case and BMC’s plans to protect Mumbai from monsoons, I entered the kitchen. The mum teasingly asked if my plans for the BIG SUNDAY MEAL are still on or if I wanted any help from her. An emphatic no and with a dirty look for doubting me was enough to silence her :P

Anyway, then came the toughest part...you know the one where one needs to actually PERFORM to silence those critics and all. Our Sachin Tendulkar does such a fine job at that, but now it was my turn to prove me mettle! I started confidently, making the marinate for the chicken and the veggies. Since I hate following recipes to the tee (How can I trust someone who measures ginger in centimetres?) I decided to go on with my intuition and what would suit ‘swad anusar’. (Years of watching Khaana Khazana was now coming to some use.)

Once the chicken and veggies were left to marinate, I moved on to the curry. We Shindes love our curry in the same typical style that has been passed on from generation to generation. Ofcorz, no one makes it like my grandmom – she is the family authority on chicken curry and sabudanyachi khichdi!! U better her rendition and I would gladly give away half of my jaidaaat to you.

It was then that my mom who was banished from her own kitchen, could take it no more. Women are like that...very giving and generous; unless it comes to their paithanis and control over the kitchen. Then you have had it, even the meekest of the lot fires up to become a modern-day Hirkani :D Anyway, since the lady of the house started feeling a tad bit insecure, I decided to delegate the chicken curry to her and yes, she did a good job at it too, under my able guidance, if I may add so ;)

Meanwhile I got the dining table ready – a special meal requires a special ambience! The curtains were pulled down and dim lights were put on. A lacy tablecloth, table-mats were pulled out and bone-china crockery was laid. (Much to my mum’s chagrin, understandably, since the maid is on leave)

Then comes the toughest part – where one has to bribe the sistah to go get the icecream. Yes, there is screaming involved – from both the parties. One tries requesting, cajoling, coaxing, emotionally blackmailing and finally, when all is tried and failed – moving the matter to the High Command – the father. The trick is to sound like you are the aggrieved party in the whole deal and how insensitive the opposition is being – to all the effort you are putting in – adding just the right touch of emotions – that all the toiling in the kitchen since past 2 hours is after all, for the family! And then the case is won!! Of course this doesn’t always work – and then one is left with no option but to use the ultimate weapon - *Sniff! Sob! And sob some more* But beware coz this can be a double edged sword! One needs to grab the First Mover’s Advantage! And yes the performance must be sympathy-grabbing! Turn it into a wail and the High Command loses his composure unleashing his wrath. (Have some respect for the poor man’s nerves – he bears 3 women in his life, all by himself!)

So once the ‘get-the-ice cream-ok-as-you-say-for-the-last-time-ever!’ was done with, I turned my attention back to my chicken and veggies. The microwave was warmed and in went the chicken to be tandoored. Yes, I said my morning prayers then. After excruciating 15 minutes, I opened the microwave and let out some seriously mouth-watering wafts of chicken tandoori. (And men say women don’t understand how it feels pacing outside the delivery rooms! ;)) It looked purrfect!! The colour, texture and smell – all seemed so fabulous, all but the final test of taste remained!

The family was finally invited at the dining table; never mind that the sistah appeared to be suddenly overtly interested in Geography lessons and claimed not to be hungry (Well a little firing from the High Command is known to result in temporary loss of appetite :P) But finally the sight of roasted tender chicken was enough to melt her anger. The rice was put in the microwave just when the starters began at the table (What impeccable timing I tell you!)

I stood at the table anticipating a fierce criticism from the miffed sistah and the always-difficult-to-please High Command (the dad), but surprise surprise!! With subtlety, the father conveyed that he likes the meal :) the sistah actually grabbed the camera phone and clicked pictures as a testament for the future time! The mum gushed over how much she loved the meal and I happily bloated with pride :)

It was one of those good days today – we didn’t not lock ourselves in different room, with dad busy with TV or my being stuck to my laptop, my mom wasn’t slogging it out in the kitchen for a change and sister wasn’t studying alone in the bedroom. We were together – not just physically, but emotionally as well. Without anyone having said it – we enjoyed that rare ‘We-are-family!’ moment.
I hope and pray that we have more of these :)