Tomorrow will shine with promises ahead...

The past tugs and pulls, tying you down,

Leaves a tear stained face and many a frowns.

The battle of past can never be won,

The pain and misery is never undone.

But heed to your heart & it will find a way,

Sooner than later, it will have it's say.

And like worn out robes the past will fade,

Your tomorrow will shine with promises ahead.

Image from here

A love like that...[II]

She was such a goon growing up. Beat many a boys in her school corridor. Once, she even slapped a senior on the school-bus back home [In her defense, he was sitting in HER seat!] She loved to argue and considered herself quite good at verbal duels. 

Times changed. She didn't. Soon she was in college. Her long tresses cut short. Boy-cut was what they called it. Collared half-sleeved shirts and a ragged pair of jeans. And the boy-cut. Almost a boy, you see. Strangely enough, she now made great friends with the guys. They no longer feared her. She was one of them. She laughed at their jokes about other girls and even added her own witty one-liners. They came to her on days of journal submission. They rallied around campaigning for her during college elections. and as weird as it may sound - they cared for her - like a buddy, in a brotherly sort of way - the girl, with the boy-cut.

Times changed again [how irritating is that!] And yet again, she didn't. There she was working in the corporate world. Cut-throat competition. Who knew being a bully at school would come to so much use later in life! She loved the aggression. The dominant streak that gets passed off as leadership qualities. And once again she became the 'man on the team'. Gym buddy. Smoke buddy. Booze buddy. They ranted about their girlfriends, she listened. They raved about their trophy wives and she listened. She smiled. She understood - something that always surprised the guys.

Times changed quickly thereafter. Her long tresses grew back. Her dark eyes shone when she laughed. She was suddenly noticeable. Second and third glances [and accompanied male attention] became a part of her life. A girl friend gifted a kaajal pencil and insisted she try on some. That day she became aware of the magic of kohl eyes. People seemed nicer, friendlier and worse, no one wanted to fight with her any more. No more verbal duels. No intelligent [or even lame] arguments.

And one day, she met him. He was smart and funny. Sensible with questionable sensitivity. But there was a spark between the two. He wasn't at his best behaviour with her. He didn't think twice before saying things on his mind. He didn't even offer her the last piece of the pastry..instead eyed hers hungrily. He didn't open doors or pull chairs for her. And he never, ever carried her laptop that she chugged around everywhere. He just walked beside hers, hands in pocket. Sometimes slowing down a step or two to match her speed. He didn't ask her how the day went by. He probably read it on her face. And he always, always started the conversation with the lamest of his jokes.

Times changed yet again. Thankfully, they both didn't. They still walk side by side, carrying their own baggage. No favours on each other. And yet they know when the other is tired. He still doesn't treat her 'like a lady'. But she knows he is the one coz he treats her the way she always wanted to be treated - a girl with a boy-cut.

A love like that [I] here

Distracted.

It's foolish the number of times I have begun writing a post, lost the train of thoughts and dumped it into drafts. I love the idea of writing while listening to music. I start with finding the right song for my mood to build up the whole environment (Hindi has a very apt term for it - samaa bandhana. English pales in comparison). Anyway, so one starts with finding the right song for the right mood and hopes to publish a blog-post one is happy with...but things somehow run down-hill after the whole youtubing thing.

Here's what happens with me:

• Create a playlist of similar mood songs on Youtube - say - Romantic
  
• Forget that one song from that really insignificant movie starring Salman Khan & that actress from the South.
• Try recollecting her name for 26 odd seconds. Ditch.
  
• Google for 'Salman Khan + Actress from South' to come up with some ridiculous search results.
• A lil' more head scratching....Ahan!! Her name in the movie was Maggie! (Talk about some food for thought!)
  
• Google for 'Salman + Maggie' - Love it is! All hail IMDb.
• Oh btw, check out this review at the bottom of the page here.
• Haan, so where was I? Yes, "Saathiya...yeh tune kya kiya"
• Buzz on GTalk - ofcourse its an old friend and I am not the one to go invisible after being buzzed, no sire. So one replies, patiently..using very little words just to give the right indication that one might be caught up in something important at the moment or when all fails 'brb' to the rescue.
• Wouldn't it be better to just change the status message to 'Busy' for a while. But no sire no, we are not the ones to simply put up a plain, boring status message are we? We are the creative class (or so we think) so it has to be a creatively borrowed 3rd line of that ghazal one once heard and is not very sure of the meaning. But what if someone pings to ask the meaning and catches one unawares! Imagine the horror! So we google for the meaning and then put up a status msg something like this:
  Kuch to mere pindar-e-mohabbat ka bharam rakh
  Tu bhi to kabhi mujhko manane ke liye aa...Ranjish hi sahi....
  
• Almost 11.5 mins since I last checked FB updates :|
• Yayness! He liked my status msg...need a wittier come-back. Google. (Yes, lame.)
• Hey, new video posted by him..must be something cool...let me check it out!
• Superb video! Like. Comment. Share.
• Hayyee. Relationship status update by Rohan & Pri? kab? kyu? kaise? and most imp. ab kiske saath? ;) (Yes, we are like that only)
• So, where was I? Video..FB...imdb...google...youtube...blogspot!

And so, in this brilliant manner a perfect blogging mood get wasted by yours truly's utter stupidity and one sinks further down the depression of not blogging enough. Does this happen to you? any foolproof solution?

P.S: While I was writing this blog, the following conversation ensued with a friend.

Ashok: abbe

rutuja: hi

Ashok: give me suggestions

rutuja: for?

Ashok: things to do

i got absolutely no work in office today :|

rutuja: haha

i m blogging..abt how i get distracted while blogging

and end up not blogging :P

Ashok: lol

i am guessing you would mention me in the credits section :P

rutuja: brb :D

@ Ashok - There you go...you got a mention on my blog! I used my first 'brb-to-the-rescue' weapon on you and holly mighty did it work!! I am extremely pleased with myself (or as they say in Queen's Land - I am mighty chuffed right now!) for almost having completed this piddly blogpost which may not mean much to the world but is a no small feat for this girl.

My very first...

haiku.

Have been wanting write haikus for a really really long time now. But like most other good things in life, I simply kept postponing the writing part and consequently regretting it. The vicious circle can be quite unfailingly endless and takes some serious effort in shaking off that inertia. But lo and behold, one does overcome the said inertia provided with just the right amount of time and that perfect mood.

So here it is... 

Dodging eyes

just a hint of guilt...

Strangers again.

P.S: Have been reading 'A web content strategist's bible' recently and if you landed here curious by the title name...I think the book is wonderful ;)  

25 under 25

So my 25th birthday is around 100 days away (103 to be precise) and hence I thought of coming up with a short-term bucket-list of sorts. A list of things I wish to do before my 25th birthday. As a friend pointed out that if I haven't done something for last 24.75 years there is little that I can achieve in these hundred days. But being the eternal optimist that I am, combined with a chronic list-maker, here goes the list I wish to strike off before 9th of January 2011.

Disclaimer: This is not an original idea...there are many such lists doing rounds currently. Ofcourse, these guys just thought of it a lil' before I did. Also considering the tight schedules of the Sherpas during this time of the year, Climbing the Mt. Everest has been kept off the list.

So without much ado, here's presenting THE LIST (drum-rolls)

1. Learn to bake cakes ...no, a chocolate cake with melted chocolate icing and choco-chips.
2. Learn to drive car.
3. Oh. That reminds me - Learn to ride bicycle!! (the one without side-wheels)
4. Get completely sloshed at least once, say the darn-est things ever and create 'funny, drunken, half-remembered' memories to tell the grand-kids.
5. Start investing. Activate the bloody online banking option!!!
6. Start paying off my Student's Loan.
7. Get in the best shape ever.
8. GOA. With. Friends.
9. Lunch at one of the South Bombay Irani Cafes (Berry Pulav, Chicken Salli Boti and Patrani Macchi. Burrp.)
10. Get a new job.
11. Grow a potted plant.
12. Self-learn how to Photoshop well.
13. Attend a book/poetry reading session.
14. Join a book club.
15. Brush up my French and practise it on unsuspecting souls.
16. Cook dinner for friends.
17. Read at least one significant works of Neruda.
18. Start a non-personal blog and post regularly.
19. Make a denim/cloth bag from online tutorials.
20. .........
21. .........
22. .........
23. .........
24. .........
25. ..........

It is now way past my bed-time and I have scratched enough brains to come up with this list of 19 'Things To Do'. I think I am growing old 'coz I seriously cant think of anymore but 25 it must be!! :(

Dear Readers, this is where I would ask you to suggest something cool/do-able/fun/not-tried-before things that I can possibly complete in next 100 days. Do send me your suggestions in the comments. I shall update this list with the name of person who suggested. :)

Thanks in advance!

Au revoir :)

Chandni Raatein!

(This post was written a month back but forgot to publish. It's an insane one, mind you - one of my random moods when the lukkhi in me had taken charge. I still don't believe I am about to publish this.)

No, I am not into corny blue films, as yet! It was either this or 'O meri Chandni'. You take the pick!

So finally landed at my latest haven - Room # 16, Hostel - Chandni, MICA, yesterday. I loved my earlier room a lot - everything was just perfect about # 5, Parijat...the location, the view, the furniture arrangement, the storage space, even the position of the electric switch.

This new place is amazing as well. My own room! No one to share it with..ALL MINE :D :D :D Okay enough gloating . No wait, did I mention it is the biggest room on the floor! Just my luck :) The room is spacious to say the least..not like those crammed hostels in the otherwise thik-thak college in Mumbai I once visited to meet a friend..what was that again? IID..no wait IIT, I think. Wateverr :D

Its a first floor corner room - the door well hidden behind the pillar. Privacy you see. You open the door and a neat and tidy room greets you warmly. The colour scheme is yellow-green-orange with a touch of purple.

Books (by the virtue of being seldom handled) are arranged neatly on a black rack and a green-yellow dari (carpet) on the floor reminding me of home.


To add just the right touch, a yellow sitting cushion!...for those idle mornings and lazy afternoon reading sessions.


For the more demanding times (say one night before the exam) there is this study table with just the right number of table-top show pieces - 3. A clock, a mug for stationery and one Ganpati bappa (He had to come along...exams jo paas karni hai).


And then there is this one piece of furniture where I shall be spending 91.472% of my non-lecture time - the bed! With a green-n-yellow bedsheet with yellow-n-white cushions. Call me crazy, but I brought along all 'wonly yellow-worange' bedsheets with me!! O wait! The bestest part...my oh-so-lovely curtains! Green..very chic and soothing.


There is this huge tree just outside my window (all 11th/12th botany gone waste..i failed to identify the damn tree!) and a path that leads to the mess on one hand (how strategic) and the classrooms (tragically, how strategic again) on the other.

So what do you think? Kya meri room aapki room say behtar hai? Just say so darlings and be my life-long friend (Did that just sound very cheap?)

So let me end this really insane post on a slightly senti note (blog ke TRPs* badhane ke liye kya kya karna padta hai!!). An ode to #16, Chandni - for the great times we shall share!

For the times we spend, in the times to come
Moments that are happy and sad are some
This heart and mind may wander and roam
When comes the night, it will find a way home
So cheers to you and a cheers to me
My heart will always be where you shall be :)

Aah! Enuff said..the bed looks gloomy, I think its yearning for my company ;)
Tada!!

1. * @ aagau Media majors at MICA, mala mahitiye blog la TRPs*** nastat, ugaach akaleche taare todu naka**
2. ** - Mala mahitiye ha Dighe madam cha dialogue aahe. Mi ithe tyala credit detey. Sue karaycha vichar tala.
3. *** BTW, fyi, Blog la Page Views and Unique Users astat - Sessions ani Time spent per session pan astat^
4. ^ - Hyala VDCP mhantat, VDCP = Virtual DCP^^
5. ^^ - Aata hey atti hotay. Somebody stop me :D

Religion is flawed only because man is flawed.

I spent two of my best hours today watching 'Angels & Demons' ...the experience still giving me goose bumps as I write this...



The age-old debate of Science vs. Religion.

How do you explain the existence of one to another?

How to explain the co-existence of both? And for how long ??

As the mysteries of one century become the logic of the next - one may say it’s a losing battle for Religion but then look around you...the faith in the Faith is stronger than ever!!

Karl Marx wondered (and wondered aloud) if religion was opium of the masses...which may have led few of us to question the need for religion. Isn't the world a much simpler place to live? When all the phenomena stand perfectly rationalized? When the miracles of old world are nothing but scientific wonders waiting to be discovered? And then why do we need the religion to sedate us, delude us providing illusions of an existence that life certainly isn't! Isn't science just the perfect answer for the rationalists amongst us? Almost like an antidote for religion, isn't it?



But then how do you explain the faith? ..the belief that ran across the world for centuries in one form or other. Yes, blaming the Pope and his Vatican running like a smoothly functioning corporation selling us hope, faith, peace and respect towards that one Big Guy sitting up there; is a very tempting option. But then is religion nothing more than the biggest con job that mankind ever faced?



In the closing scene of ‘Angels & Demons’, Cardinal Saverio Mortati says something so profound that it almost explains the age-old fallacies of religion. Almost. He says, 'Religion is flawed only because man is flawed.'

Religion and Science. Yes, both are outcomes of Man's imagination and creativity. Both man-made; yet so different - one appeals to the heart and the other to the mind. It’s up to us to choose - heart over mind or mind over heart. Religion has made blunders in the past - the propagators of religion can almost share a bench with Hitler in hell for their atrocities and impositions. We still pay for it and would continue to do so for ages to come. But science functions no better. Its blunders are going to be the blunders of mankind in the future.



And may be..just may be..when man is tired of science one day - he will look back and seek solace in religion as we do now seeking solace in science from the misgivings of religion. Is this why they are meant to co-exist? To offer man some respite when he has had enough of the other? Well, who knows..Maybe.



When Karl Marx said, "Religion is the opium of masses," one might wonder if he was asking us wean ourselves from it. May be not! For a man who learnt from the sufferings of others - maybe he found the key to the existence and sustenance of religion. May be he found a reason for religion in man's life. In the full context his words were:

“Religious distress is at the same time the expression of real distress and the protest against real distress. Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, just as it is the spirit of a spiritless situation. It is the opium of the people. The abolition of religion as the illusory happiness of the people is required for their real happiness. The demand to give up the illusion about its condition is the demand to give up a condition which needs illusions.” (Critique of Hegel’s Philosophy of Right.)

How difficult this mortal human life would be if not for the illusory happiness that Marx talks about! How would life be if all things stood perfectly well explained and rationalized! ‘The Logic’ would then be our God and we all devoid of any hope or fear. (On second thoughts – Why does mankind always need someone/something to look up to? We remove God and replace it by Logic but the truth remains we replace it. But then again, it’s a better place to be – the last time one race made the others look up to it – it nearly wiped out the ‘others’!)

So are we saying that a flawed religion is better than none at all? Of course, it would be same as a flawed science (we are moving towards it) better than none at all. And since the situation of perfect religion and perfect science (just like a perfect competition) almost never exists..man has to make do with one of them...leaving the choice either to himself or going with the flow as per the societal context of his time and place.

Phew! That’s a lot of unanswered questions! But may be the point is to question rather than a muted acceptance! And yes, like all man-made creations – religion and science included, one needs to accept their flaws instead of overlooking them.

To quote Karl Marx again – ‘Religion is the impotence of the human mind to deal with occurrences it cannot understand.’

Mi majh harpun basle ga...

Has it ever happened to you that you have one of the most depressing afternoons of your life and short nap later you wake up to a cheerful evening?
Today I 'decidedly' tried to be happy and you know what? I didn't take much of an effort:) No chats or phone calls - I decided, seeking out others to make myself feel good temporarily isn't an option. 'Nirmal Anand' is the way to nirvana :D

मराठी गाणी ऐकायचा mood झाला. Youtube गाठलं आणी पहिल्या गाण्यातंच घरची आठावण आली. Not the teary-eyed one; the one which leaves a smile on the face. बाबांनी सुधीर भटांच्या एखाद्या कवितेचा अर्थ समजवला होता ती संध्याकाळ - किंवा एकत्र बसून 'Nakshtranche Dene' बघितलेला रविवार, पटकन डोळ्यासमोर आला . आमच्या घरात संगीताला फार फार जपतात अणि जोपासतात. आई-बाबा दोघांनाही आवड आहे. अगदी शास्त्रीय संगीत ते भावगीत, भक्ति गीत, सुगम संगीत काहीही असो. बाबांना नाट्य संगीत आणी ग़ज़ल वर अधिक प्रेम. कुमार गन्धर्व, बाळ गन्धर्व, मास्टर दीनानाथ, पु ला, गा दी माँ, पंडित वसंतराव देशपांडे, सुधीर फडके ही सगळी मंडली आमच्या घरात वरचेवर स्मरली जातात.

Anyway. ठरवून नविन गाणी ऐकायचा तसा ज़रा कठिणंच असतं. नेमका कोणतं निवडावं - आणी एक संपला की दूसरा कुठला शोधावं! जुनी मराठी गाणी आठवता आठवत न्हवती - शेवटी Sa Re Ga Ma Pa च्या episodes मधून गाणी घेतली त्यांच्ये original videos शोडून काढले. भन्नाट मज्जा आली!! जुनी गाणी झाली अणि मध्येच आपल्या संदीप खरे ची आठावण आली! माझ्या बाबांना अगदी recently त्याचा शोध लागला अणि झालं!! एका patient च्या recommendation वर त्याच्या गाण्याची CD घरात आली अणि दिवस रात्र आम्ही खरेमय झालो. बाबांनी शाळेतल्या मुलाला एखादा नविन विषय पटकन आवडून जावा ह्या उत्साहाने एका diary मध्ये सगळया गाण्यांचे lyrics लिहून काढले. ती process पण फार गमतीदार होती - आधी ते गाणं अक्खं ऐकायचं - मग appreciate वगैरे करूँ जाला की diary आणि pen घेउन बसायचा आणि ते परत लावायचं. गाणं सुरु झालं की realisation व्हायचा की pen चालत नाहीये - पण गाणं असं मध्ये थांबवणं बरं नाही ह्या विचाराने or rather CD player वर expertise establish न झाल्या मुळे ते पुन्हा तसच संपूर्ण वाजू द्यायचं. अत्ता नविन पेनाच्या तयारी ने ते तीस्र्यंदा लावायचं अणि word to word लिहून काढायचं! ऑनलाइन lyrics मिळतात आणि printouts काढता येतात ह्या टुक्कार गोष्टिन्कडे माझे बाबा फारसे लक्ष देत नाहीत. ते त्यांनी मनावर घेतला तर माझी पंचैत होइल हे नक्की! :D

So finally संदीप खरे ची गाणी ऐकली - अगदी साध्य सोप्प्या भाषेतले त्याचे मार्मिक observations खूप appealing असतात. Highly recommended!
Special mention - मी मोर्चा नेला नाही हे गाणं कुणाच्या अध्यात-न-मध्यात, सरळ आयुष्य जगणार्या typical middle-class मराठी मेंटालिटी च एक fantastic depiction आहे!!

Phew! Removing marathi typos is sucha pain!! Wanted to try it out for sometime but this is probably my first and last attempt at it. One more reason to not like Google! :D
So. Aata hya pudhe majha marathi asa vachava lagnaar!

I thought I would end this post by sharing my playlist - if you guys find some of your favourites here, do let me know. And any recommendations are welcome too :)
So here it is:-

शुरा आम्ही वंदिले
मागे उभा मंगेश, पुढे उभा मंगेश
लख लख चंदेरी
भय इथले संपत नाही
त्या फुलांच्या गंधकोशी
ऐरणीच्या देवा तुला
ती गेली तेंव्हा
रुणुझुणु रुणुझुणु दे भ्रमरा
कौसल्येचा राम
झाला महार पंधरिनाथ
तू तेंव्हा तशी

Ek sundar sandhyakal record karnyacha prayatna. Majhya saathi hi pahilich vel hoti. Assignments ani case studies madhye haravnyaadhi ghalavlela ek chamatkarik vel. Kadachit hyat navin asa konala vatla nasel...youtube var videos akkha jag baghta pan aajchya saarkha jagavegla anand mala aadhi nahi milala :)

I need to stop searching my happiness in others; I shall find it in me :)

A day in the life of india...

Every morning we let into our homes a crap worth 4 rupees.

It not only pollutes our homes but also our minds and to some extent even our thinking!

It's called the times of India.

"It's just a damn newspaper!"...you would say,

"NO...it's a way of life, it's a culture".

It peeps into our homes in the wee hours of the morning and soon becomes an integral part of our lives.

Now you would ask, "What is your problem, Rutuja??"

Well,here's my answer..."Aren't newspapers supposed to be mirrors of the world, reflecting the happenings of your world and beyond, keeping a neutral and unbiased proposition with a touch of humanity?"

Well then if my definition is correct, then the TOI is certainly not that!

It doesnt start with headlines of the day..but with an ad just below the TOI logo. This is just the beginning of their money-minded attitude. The news are modified to suit the tastes of elitist society. Just when you thought that oil-for-food was the biggest scam of the year orchestrated by "highly respected" certain Singh,it was nicely shoven from the front pages to 'hardly-ever-read' backpages of the daily.And the biggest joke of the year was a word to word analysis of medical report of the BIG B !! We certainly did not need that! especially when we were still recovering from the shocks and gasps of 100 crore scam that Mr.Singh gifted us.

I have seriously began to doubt my knowledge in the queen's language as i cannot find words to describe what i feel about the TOI supplement-BOMBAY TIMES.

Do we, the middle class, really need the daily dose of page 3 culture? the hugs and air kisses?? the sight of skimpily-clad elitists getting drunk and all high??? the fashion and false eyelashes????

I am sure that many teenagers today will face a problem recognising Sudha Murthy but will closely follow the fashion tips by one Mrs. Parmeshwar Godrej!

Once i committed the heinous crime of reading the heading of a strip called "Dr. Mojo". Thank god my conscience prevented me from reading any further!!

Its time we answer these questions ourselves. Who are our role models? Who are the people we look upto? Its for us to decide and to each his own!

By the way.... I really loved, "A day in the life of india...Times of India" ads...quite heart-touching! but so unlike the actual thing!

But you know what?? I'm stuck like dope, on this thing called hope.

So, my new year's gonna begin with "The Hindustan Times".

Happy new year to all!

And Happy reading too!!